– Actually, it seems you’re in your thirties yourself. Be honest : How does it feel?
[Mentally, I’m in my late teens, so not much has changed. I’m 34 now, turning 35 soon. Thinking about that is…… kinda scary.]

– Scary……. What’s scary about it?
[What’s so scary? Back in elementary school, when I was a kid, I used to think that 30-somethings were so old. I haven’t changed that much since back then. Even though I’m that age myself. Am I allowed to be 30? I wonder (laughs). Of course, I have matured a little bit since elementary school (laughs). But in high school, at 16 or 17, I felt like I was done growing up. But that, doesn’t everyone do that? Not change that much after reaching 16 or 17? If you think about it, it’s a wide stretch of maturity compared to elementary school.]

– I think there certainly is a part of oneself that doesn’t change after those days. But even so, now that you’ve passed into your thirties you must feel like you’ve changed somehow. In the mental sense, regarding maturity.
[Seriously?! I totally haven’t (both burst into laughter). Nah, is that more or less maturing? Even for me. But in my case that stretch of maturity is really narrow. Until 16, 17 I grew up reaaaally fast, all at once. Ever since then, until now, it’s been so much slower, I really feel like I’m only getting more mature a tiny little bit at a time.]

– Until the lower teens, there’s a bodily aspect to it, a sudden rush of growth that doesn’t happen anymore, that could have been scary too.
[Hmm…… Yeah, there was that too. You know, when I was little, I had this mental image of “adulthood”. Adults work hard, they think the right way and they live by those thoughts, that’s what I imagined. However, the way I am now, I haven’t become anything even remotely like that mental image of adulthood I had when I was a kid, and I’ve come to realise that.]

– As a human being, you still have some maturing to do before you can really be an adult, perhaps you’re afraid of that realisation.
[Right. Anyway, when I was a kid, I thought adults had to be something like “Sennin” (1) didn’t I? I must have.]

– As if they had to keep themselves above everything?
[That’s it. “Young people these days,” that’s a phrase adults use a lot, isn’t it? But I wonder about adults these days. I think adults today are worse than the young people. Any way you look at it.]

– In what situations? When do you feel that way about today’s adults?
[Take this for example, it happened just recently. I was in my car, at the high-speed tollgate, and there was another car diagonally in front of me. On this side of the tollgate, you slow down, right? That’s when it was. They dumped an ashtray out the window. Dumped out still-smoking cigarette butts onto the road. It’s an adult doing this, an adult! An old guy. “The hell you doin’?!” It was an “Eeeeh?” moment, I couldn’t believe my eyes. I was so surprised. The point is, when I was a kid, I thought that adults did the right thing. But, there’s a ton of adults who don’t. Now that I’m an adult myself, I know. When you’re a little kid, everything adults or seniors say sounds like the right thing, you get caught up thinking that. However, it turns out that’s not the case, which you find out once you grow up. It’s the same with schoolteachers. As a kid, you think “Teacher said it, so it must be right,” don’t you? I don’t know why this makes me angry, but it’s happened that I’ve thought maybe I was wrong. Actually, it wasn’t me, it was probably the teacher saying something weird. Looking back now, I can think of a lot of instances of that.]

– When you were a child, you thought that “Adults are always right,” but it was nothing more than an illusion. Now that you’re an adult yourself, you can take a good look at the other adults all around you. How about this : Do you feel at all fascinated by the accumulation of years?
[I’ve never been fascinated by that. Because people have to get old, even though they hate it. There’s no need to admire that necessity, is there? That’s why there’s no need to go “I wanna hurry and be a grown up!” either. Some people do say that, but even people who hate getting older will end up being adults someday.]

– So, do you have any idea of how you’ll spend your thirties?
[No, not the slightest.]

– Is anything different from your twenties?
[There’s nothing tangibly different but, it’s just that knowing and thinking that I’m in my thirties feels a bit distasteful.]

– I wonder how you’ll be in your fourties.
[The idea of being 40 is hard to grasp for me. At that point, I’ll probably be better off accepting that I’m an “old guy.” But at this point, I hate the thought. Actually, as I go about my life, I don’t normally think that I’m 34.]

– Sometimes you don’t feel like you really are your age, right?
[Yeah, that’s for sure. Take this for example, I’ve got more physical strength than I used to have. Better concentration, too. Sometimes I’m more aware of those aspects of me.]

– What about other aspects? For example, do you sometimes feel like there’s a generation gap between you and younger people?
[I don’t. Ever since way back, I’ve been able to tell what’s going to be fashionable and what isn’t. That still hasn’t changed.]

– Interviewer : Toujou Sachie
Translated by Natalie Arnold

1. As previously explained in chapter 24, Sennin is a figure from Japanese mythology. He was a sage who lived as a hermit in the mountains and acquired the skill to perform miracles, as well as the ability to live forever. So, tetsu thought that being an adult meant living a disciplined, detached life.Go back.